27th November 2010

Writing up what we are doing in Malawi is becoming a more difficult task. Things we get up to out here that are becoming more routine don’t really seem worthy of writing up into a blog, it seems inane and boring.

That’s where I’m wrong. I’m missing out lots of small points which I may have added earlier on and some of them are unforgettable and definitely thinking points!

Take for instance my discussion in the bar at the lodge last week about Christmas. Sat on a wooden stool looking along the bar at three of the Malawian workers at the lodge, I brought up the Christmas topic. “What are your traditions?” “Do you give presents?” “What do you have for dinner?” I asked with wonder. I got answers to my questions and they asked theirs. I started thinking of home, including the awful lights along New Street, wishing everybody ‘Seasons Greetings’. It would be rude to say ‘Merry Christmas’ eh?

My Malawian friends didn’t understand my explanation of political correctness in the UK anymore than I do. But it was when I got onto the subject of Father Christmas that they really lost it. Explaining that we convince little children that there is a fat man with a big white beard, belly and red suit that flies around on a reindeer (which I had to compare to bushbuck for understanding) powered sleigh, handing out presents, only once he has squeezed his way down a chimney, I saw their faces freeze in amazement. I couldn’t help but pause, laugh and announce, “It’s crazy isn’t it!”

Patrick agreed “You’re crazy people man,” as he turned to his Carlsberg Green. “Why can’t you just give them presents because you care for them?”

I understood his logic and agreed with it. It was just one example of such a small thing which I think of as normal, being a big difference between our cultures.

One thing our cultures share, which I guess is the same all over the world, is a love for music. Malawians sing amazingly. The churches here echo with fantastic voices, singing for hours on end in their local language. It’s quite moving. What I find even more interesting though is their taste in western music.

Climbing onto a truck last week containing two Malawian brothers from Blantyre, to get a lift up to Mzuzu, we began a musical discussion. The brother, who was not driving, had clearly had a few bottles of Special Brew on the trip north and was in very friendly spirits. He wore a ripped Chicago Bulls jacked, pale blue, ripped jeans and no shoes, smelt like a brewery and had a clear dislike of Scania’s poor quality truck which their father owned.

His taste in western music reflected that of many Malawian males in their early 20’s. “Aaaaaah man, you look like you in Westlife. Are you in Westlife? I love Westlife!” he called at the top of his voice. His brother agreed by howling and then chuckling like a hyena.

“Yeh yeh, and you must be Craig David?” I replied, waiting anxiously for his response, half predicting his answer.

“Aaaaaah yeeeaaaah! Craig David!” He was clearly a fan. Craig David and Westlife, along with Backstreet Boys are by far the most popular acts in this part of Africa.

This fact, along with another cultural difference makes for a very interesting scene when you walk past a Malawian bar at night. Men, who get along as friends, tend to hold hands and guide each other to different places. So an evening stroll here for a western visitor can, at any time, be met by two Malawian men falling around drunk, holding hands, singing ‘I’m flying without wings!” No one raises an eyebrow. Might get a different reaction on Broad Street mind.

Time-keeping is an issue which would bug even the most laid back Brit on a first visit to Malawi. I mentioned in previous blogs that I was to start a football club and we have begun teaching environmental lessons at Luwawa School. They have been going extremely well. The football team have won all of their recent matches and the students are really excelling with their knowledge of local environmental issues. It hasn’t however been easy.

We try to do things properly when arranging sessions or lessons with the school, by visiting the headteacher and setting a specific day and time for the events. However, organisation isn’t really a positive trait of most locals. Last week our conversation with Mr Makamo went something like this;

“Is football club still ok for Tuesday?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Ok, great. What time?”

“After two.”

“Oh alright, shall we say half past then?”

“Yes, maybe, well… just after two. They will join you when they have finished lunch.”

“…right…”

This just seems to be the way. Football club actually started that Tuesday at 3:30. I have become no stranger to sitting on the side of the pitch, waiting … waiting. They will come, just when they are ready. When the first child arrives, he takes the whistle and blows it in a repeated fashion for what seems like an hour to notify the others, who come smiling but very slowly.

Last weekend I was in the forestry station when one of the guys from the senior team called me and let me know there was a game at the weekend.

“Kick off at fifteen hundred hours.”

That seemed precise enough. I was there at 2. By 5pm we finally admitted defeat, the team from Chikwa were not coming. So we trained. Why had they not come? Had anybody actually told them in the first place?

On Wednesday I turned up for training. An hour wait this time and I gave up. Played with the 10 year olds instead. When the seniors did turn up for training last night, my adjusted approach now means that I don’t even ask what had happened two days earlier. I half expect it now. Though one of the defenders did let me know, “I hear that you came on Wednesday. We went drinking instead. You see, we like drinking.”

“Mmm, me too” I replied, accepting the conclusions which I had already come to. But they are keen, they are fit and genuinely they would like to be organised. It just seems the attitude is that a commitment is actually a suggestion. And a suggestion can definitely be out powered by desire, such as drinking.

The problem is, getting so used to these differences, will I begin to add them as features and take them home as personal characteristics? Turn up for football an hour late? Arrange to meet someone, not show and go drinking instead? Stop believing in Father Christmas? START LISTENING TO CRAIG DAVID!!?

We’ll have to be careful. Results could be disastrous.